A concept that I have recently become very interested in is resilience. Originally, a friend of mine brought my attention to this social work concept. She cited it in another friend who had come out of a really challenging set of circumstances still buoyant and positive. How is it that some of us come undone by life’s challenges, and others remain steadfast and undaunted?
I have begun reflecting on this question in relation to the women in my village here in Namibia. They are amazing. Many of them keep going, no matter the odds.
When I interviewed “Ataka” (see previous blog post), she told me it was her faith in God that kept her going. Currently, I am reading a book by Andrew Harvey called The Hope: A Sacred Guide to Activism. In it, Harvey talks about “how impassioned and sincere prayer can fill you with a courage and energy beyond ordinary human capacity.” He talks about Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King, Jr., and others. They all relied on prayer, and said they could not have done their important and courageous work without it.
I have always been a skeptic. Even today, I do not pray properly. Being in the Peace Corps, I have found more time to do yoga, but true sitting meditation or prayer is something that has always escaped me. However, reading this by Harvey, and experiencing life here and sometimes not knowing where else to turn, I am inspired by this power of prayer, and interested in how prayer, spirituality and religion intersect with resilience.
I recently posted about Victor Frankl. He said that people find meaning in life when they can help others, when they know others rely on them, or when they have a seminal work or project which they are devoting themselves to.
What is behind women’s resilience here in Namibia. What inspires them to keep going?
This week, I am posting photos from our school’s prize giving ceremony.
But first, please let me introduce “Zo,” one of my favorite neighbors:
Him and the other kids come over often to color, play, hang out, and generally test my patience.
There were actual two prize giving ceremonies. First, one of our school’s donor’s came and presented awards to some of our learners who “go the extra mile with a smile.” Below is our school choir performing at the ceremony, and some photos of the ceremony, and the “soccer team” who was awarded jerseys.
Later in the afternoon, there was an academic award ceremony for the best performers. Each of the top learners, as well as the top three in each academic discipline were awarded certificates:
“If you have been spared in order to live, are you living?”
Recently, I was reminded of the gift of life. So simply, but so easy to take for granted.
The quote above is from Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’s book Life Lessons. The quote is a wake-up call. It is easy to sink beneath so many different fears or doubts. But perhaps, like Frankl, we have been spared for a reason.
A few years ago, I received an award in honor of Jennifer Caldwell. Jen was a human rights worker and University of Washington graduate and Bonderman Fellow who tragically passed away in South Africa. A friend of mine and I won a human rights scholarship in her name. I never knew Jen while she was alive, but after learning her story, I viewed winning an award in her name as a true honour. It was a call to action: she died doing what she loved and rallying for social justice and human rights. In her short time on earth, she made a true difference in terms of human rights work, and in the lives of her family and friends. That was very clear.
But we are still here. What will we do with our one wild and precious lives? (Mary Oliver quote)
There is Jen’s story, and there are many others. One that inspires me in particular is that of Amy Biehl. Amy was a Peace Corps worker in South Africa right around the time that apartheid fell. She got caught up in mob violence, was targeted for her color and killed. It is a tragic story, but there is a beautiful ending. Amy’s parents forgave the men who killed her. They visited their parents, looked them in their eyes, and forgave them. For killing their daughter. Such strength of character, such a peaceful and loving approach to stop the cycle of violence. Of course violence continues, but again, what each of us does matters. And the peaceful, non-violent movements of Martin Luther King Junior, Desmond Tutu, Nelson Mandela, and so many others, move on.
“If you have been spared in order to live, are you living?”
Recently, I read Victor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. He was a prisoner in Auschwitz and Dachau during WWII. The book demonstrates how, even in the most desolate, hopeless places, wo/man finds meaning. Despite inhumane, crushing working conditions, and severe mental, physical and emotional torture, Victor Frankl and some of his fellow prisoners, were able to explore a richer, deeper, and more intensified internal spiritual life.
Frankl’s book applies directly to my community here. People can and do find refuge in their internal spiritual lives, and in God. I have seen, on a deep level, the amazing human capacity for resilience, the ability to “spring back,” to adapt, and to transcend. I don’t always understand this, but it is perhaps not for me to understand.
Frankl states that our “attitudes are all we can control.” He speaks of men who remained positive, and who gave away their last piece of bread and who comforted others in the concentration camps, despite their own deep suffering. He says that these people “bore witness to the fact that the last inner freedom cannot be lost….It is this spiritual freedom – which cannot be taken away – that makes life meaningful and purposeful.” We ARE our choices. The only thing we can indeed control is our attitude, our perspective on life, how we receive, understand, and react to any given situation.
He goes on, “suffering is an ineradicable part of life, even as fate and death. Without suffering and death, human life cannot be complete.” As is often said, you have to know pain to know joy.
Frankl was extraordinary and incredibly inspirational. His experience provides perspective to any difficulties we may be facing in our lives. He tells us, “Man’s inner strength may raise him above his outward fate…Everywhere man is confronted with fate, with the chance of achieving something through his own suffering.”
One woman, who was about to die in the concentration camp, told Frankl, “I am grateful that fate has hit me so hard. In my former life I was spoiled and did not take spiritual accomplishment seriously.” Even in her darkest hour, she saw the gift of perspective and enlightenment that had been afforded her. Frank responded by quoting Spinoza on ethics, “Emotion, which is suffering, ceases to be suffering as soon as we form a clear and precise picture of it.”
Later in the book, Frank talks about love. He says that love is the meaning of life. Love transcends everything. Even in camp; he communed and communicated with his wife. It didn’t matter to him if she was still alive or dead. Their love transcended space and time, and her presence and their connection, even though they were separated physically, sustained and fortified him. True love knows no bounds.
At one point, Frankl saw his wife appear in the form of a bird, landing right before him as he performed his back-breaking manual labor in the freezing cold winter. Corrie Ten Boom, who hid Jews during WWII and eventually went to jail for it, accounts a similar story in her book The Hiding Place.
Frankl cites as the answer to the meaning of life, it “must consist…in right action and right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual….(the) uniqueness and singleness which distinguishes each individual to his existence has a bearing on creative work as much as it does on human love.”
When asked to give a motivational talk to his fellow prisoners, Frankl quoted Nietzsche, “That which doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger,” and an unknown poet, “What you have experienced on earth, no power can take from you.” All of our experiences, whether perceived as “good” or “bad,” make us who we are, enriching our lives and our perspectives. Everything is a learning experience. For Frankl, “life in a concentration camp tore open the human soul and exposes its depths.” Upon being freed, he said that “after all he has suffered, there is nothing he need fear any more – except his God.”
Each of us have this choice every day, every minute: to open up or to shut down. I am also reading some of Brene Brown’s work on vulnerability, which is also related to the concept of gracious space: a spirit and a setting which invites the stranger and opens to learning in public. Each of the choices that we are constantly making MATTER.
Frankl’s work touched me on a deep level. It gave me the perspective that no matter how hard it gets, we are not alone. Many have suffered much more deeply. Somehow, humans adapt. I do not know how some people in Namibia survive, how they maintain their hope despite daunting odds. But it is not for me to know. I can simply sit in awe of it; I can just accompany and ally with my friends in the village where I work. I can only seek to understand. Frankl’s book helped to give me perspective on the state of suffering in Namibia and in the world. He was an extraordinary human being. He summoned the strength and courage to not only survive the concentration camps, but to actually benefit in terms of developing his spiritual life. He was able to inspire, motivate, and encourage his fellow prisoners, despite the horrific conditions in the camps, and the fact that they literally faced death each hour, each minute. Frankl accounts situation after situation in which fate seemed to save him; but it was also very much his will to live, to survive, to connect, and to find meaning, which kept him alive.
We can reach beyond the layers of modern life, beneath all of the incessant distractions, to our deeper selves, our higher selves, our greatest and most enlightened selves. Each of us matters. Whether you know it or not, you are an inspiration to someone, you are helping someone else just by your very existence. And beyond that, the choices we make from this moment forward shape and mold each of our destinies and our internal spiritual lives. I can only admire, and strive for, the deep spiritual awakening that Frankl speaks of.
Thanks for reading. Clearly, I strongly recommend the book!
Recently, the Namibian Ministry of Education sponsored a "Read-a-Thon" throughout the country. The goal was to foster a love of reading, and to encourage students to read. Below are photos of some of our learners reading at the event. Everyone, grades pre-primary to grade 9, participated. (Our school only goes up to grade 10, and they are already busy with end-of-year national exams. Only those that perform well will be granted a place in grade 11.)
The Swakop half marathon was awesome - my favorite moment was cheering on one of the male marathoners, and his humble "thank you"....it reminded me of the equal playing field I have always felt as an athlete (whether man or woman). It was a breath of fresh air in light of the too prevalent gender inequality, DV, even so-called "passion killings" that unfortunately take place here in Namibia. As an athlete, I have always felt respected regardless of my gender, and a great sense of equality between men and women. Title 9 in the US has accomplished a lot - of course, there is always more to be done! Here in Namibia, I feel real pain for my sisters, for the women here, for what is often gender inequality. I know it is only a small insight into the challenges and oppression that women, and people in general, face around the world. I am inspired, though, by how far we have come, and by how much we are certain to accomplish together.
