Zambia ~

After 19+ hours of bus travel, I am here in Zambia. Tomorrow, I am meeting with a group of students from the University of Washington Bothell. I will be giving a talk about the Peace Corps and my experience in Namibia. I can't wait to meet the group, and to see their amazing professor again, Dr. Leslie Ashbaugh.

So far, Zambia is beautiful! Livingstone is a vibrant, dynamic city set just on the outskirts of Victoria Falls. We will travel to Vic Falls later in the week.

I look forward to hear about the student's reflections on the Exploration Seminar thus far. They are here studying international development. I have heard from former participants on the program that it is life-changing. Knowing Professor Ashbaugh, I am sure that it continues to be so!

I will post photos of the trip soon. Hope you are all well.

"We have only this chance to love – now, today..."

This weekend, I was continuing to read Mark Nepo’s Book Finding Inner Courage. He says, “We have only this chance to love – now, today, to love whoever or whatever is before us. For the mountains will outlast us. The love will outlast us…put down whatever you have carved that is sharp – your mind, your edge, all your prepared responses.”

Later, he talks about a teacher who continued to work with her students even despite the violence and gunshots outside her inner-city classroom doors. The teacher comforted her students, and walked them home after school one day. She says that it is her “job to find something to love in every child.” As a teacher, I find that to be so true. There are 2 kids in my homeroom class that definitely have a learning disability – unfortunately there is not a good system for catering to special-needs students here in Namibia. So I do the best that I can, and I appreciate actually how compassionate the other students are towards these two as well.

It reminds me of some of the inspirational teacher movies that are out there…Dangerous Minds, Freedom Writers, the one with Mr. Vincente in which his AP class in an inner-city school beats all of the odds to get a top score. And I want to be that teacher. Teaching demands that you look beyond the surface and the everyday. It isn’t easy when you are faced with disrespect, classroom management issues, etc. But it is our job to look beyond this. It is kind of like Howard Zinn who says that you have to study history to APPLY it to today’s world, seeking and applying its relevance to today, not merely working within history, observing it as a relic, but actively engaging it. It is the same with teaching, or really with anything – there is the theory and the praxis and the trick is melding and merging the two.

Finally, a love theme surfaced in what I have been reading and listening to. There is, again, Alice Walker’s quote, “Anything we love can be saved.” And in Nepo’s book he says that “God was not interested in my theology, but my capacity to love.” India Arie sings about “the greatest disease in the world is hate…the cure for hate is love.” Love is certainly the most Godly and powerful of forces in the world.

A real test of these reveries will be how and if they apply to the frenetic pace of life in the U.S. As a Peace Corps Volunteer, you think ahead to re-entry and re-integration. Of course it will happen – we as humans are infinitely adaptable. But I don’t think it will be easy, and I certainly want to integrate many of the new lessons and philosophies that I have learned here back into my life in the U.S. I don’t think it is healthy to run so fast and so hard that you have no time to think about where you are going or why. I don’t think anyone benefits when most people in society are over-stressed and over-worked. The key is the elusive middle ground, and seeking balance is truly a lifelong journey.

Kids and Animals…

This week, I visited our school’s pre-primary classroom, where I took these adorable shots:

Our pre-primary teacher is a star! He is great with these little ones.

Then, the highlight of the weekend was attending a safari animal game auction. Below is the barn/staging area where all of the animals are contained and kept for viewing while the auction attendees view them through small peephole flaps (so as not to stress the animals).

Next are some of the animals: ostrich, giraffes, antelope ~

Finally, a view landscape shots: scrub and savannah ~

The game auction was quite interesting to observe. The purpose of the sale was primarily for farmers who want to have the game on hand for hunting parties, or for farms which want game on hand for game drives and safaris for tourists. The animals are stunningly beautiful up close, but I was reminded that “this is big business here” many times today. This year, farming and agriculture are taking a huge hit in Namibia because there is a severe drought here. However, tourism and farming are still 2 of the main industries in the country and are in some places still thriving.

From the anthropological perspective, it was interesting to observe who was attending this game auction. The prices of the game were extraordinary – over $40,000 USD for some of the rare antelopes such as roan or sables. Giraffes went for around $1,200 USD. So the people in attendance were mainly wealthy, white farmers. Sharply dressed, powerful people purchasing huge safari animals. It is a huge operation; the barn complex pictured above costs millions of dollars because it has to be safe and secure enough to house very powerful animals until they are ready to be taken away to their new home.

I appreciate being able to compare and contrast these different sides of Namibia. This weekend, two different worlds: today the game auction, tomorrow the township…

Jump Into the Illusion…

Writing Authentically…

This week, I am (especially) choosing to write from the heart. This is a conscious decision, especially after my graduate school training, where I studied “gracious space.” Gracious space is a spirit and a setting where you “invite the strange” and “learn in public.” I am choosing to do this here and now as I believe the power of gracious space is not to be underestimated – as we each work to have the courage to learn in public, to share our doubts, fear, and experiences, it unconsciously gives others permission to also do so.

There is a quote from Clarissa Pinkola Estes, author of Women Who Run With Wolves where she says…

“One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul. Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully lit and willing to show it.”

― Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés

Today, I was reflecting on 2 lessons that I have learned in past years. One was discovered during a “28 day plan” that my dear friend Mel and I embarked upon. (Of course, 28 days of self-discovery and self-improvement have become a lifetime’s journey). We came to the conclusion that relationships are just like economics: you must not sell yourself short. If you “under-sell” yourself – no one will be compelled to “pay more” for you – meaning that if you do not value yourself and command respect, no one will just give it to you. The same friend recently sent me a quote from Beyonce, “Power isn’t given; it’s taken.” The point is: respect yourself, love yourself, or no one else is. It all starts within, with each one of us.

The second lesson I have been reflecting on is the illusions that we may sometimes jump into. Specifically, not to jump into the illusion of finding fulfillment in someone or something other than yourself. Not only is this impossible, it is a trick of the mind and the psyche. How simple and unimaginative would it be if you could simply rely on someone else beyond yourself to complete and fulfill you, to make you happy and alive? Alas, this responsibility lies completely on your own shoulders. We are social beings – the true joy and meaning in life come from our relationships, our friendships, and the love we share between ourselves as humans. But the real work comes from within: how will you define, shape and create this one wild and crazy life that you have been given? How will it feel on that judgment day when all is said and done? What will we regret, or be especially happy that we in fact did?

All of these contemplations strangely bring me to two of my students. I cannot tell you how much in awe of these two particular students I am. How they inspire me every day. How even on the darkest days when the classroom management seems quite out of control, when you are overwhelmed that half of your students seem illiterate, when you just wonder if you are even cut out for this work – even on such days, it is the bright and shining light of students such as these two that cuts through that haze. (I will call them S and E to protect their identity.) S and E are cousins, and they live in an orphanage near the school where I teach in Namibia. I didn’t know their situation until recently when I visited the orphanage to help the staff with a computer issue. E is an orphan, and S’s father died when she was young, and her mother is an alcoholic.

S and E are the best of the best. They complete every assignment. They engage in every classroom discussion. You can always count on them to carry the day. Recently, I really challenged my grade 8 and 9 students to delve into a poem about dreams, race and reconciliation in Namibia, and their vision for the future of their country. It was quite above the heads of most of the learners. Not S! She went there! She understood every metaphor and everything the author hinted and alluded to. She was incredible! I would have never guessed that she has such a difficult home life, because she presents herself as the most well-balanced and clever student in the entire school! I am so proud of her I would like to think of her as my own daughter. Another example of her confidence and creativity was in a recent skit that I assigned my students. They had their choice of various “everyday interaction” topics. S chose a scene where a girl is asking advice from her father. Most students worked in pairs or groups. S confidently told me she would be presenting alone – and she brought down the house! She painted a moustache on one half of her face. She used different voices, and different sides of her face to portray the girl and the father. On the left side was the moustache, and she would wear glasses. To be herself, she turned to her right side (no moustache) and she removed the glasses. She did an incredible job! It was so clever and entertaining, and really goes to show her grace under fire and her positive sense of self-esteem, even without parents at home to support and encourage her. This gives me even more respect for the young student.

S went on to touch my heart when she wrote a response to the same poem mentioned above. The poem is by Hugh Ellis (I blogged about him a while ago), and is called Dreams. I asked students what THEIR dreams are. This is a common theme with my students. I really want to encourage them to DREAM, to EXPLORE, to DISCOVER, to find INSPIRATION and to TRANSEND their situation. It is difficult in our village – it is a resource-scarce environment. Many students don’t have enough to eat or a comfortable place to sleep. They certainly don’t have the peace and quiet of a bedroom with a desk to quietly study in. So it fills one with wonder when they find the wherewithal to transcend, to steel themselves against difficult circumstances, and to truly eek out all they can from the education that is presented to them.

Back to S – she really GOT this poem. I asked the students what their dreams were. Ellis was discussing his dream in post-apartheid Namibia – how he did not want to dream of violence and division any more. He wants white flags, doves, and peace. S got it 100%! She answered the question of what she dreams about quite literally. She said that she sometimes dreams that her mother has died. (Remember, her mother is an alcoholic – to such an extent that S is living in the orphanage). She said this scares her – that she loves her mother very much and of course does not want her to die. She said she dreams of spending time with her mother in a very normal way – perhaps spending the day shopping together or running errands. The way S shared this with me in her homework assignment really made my heart go out to her. Here she is, excelling in every way in her academic life, but all the while she is struggling so much internally – truly beating the odds by studying, fighting to achieve all she can, even without the love and support of her parents. I find her and E both to be exceptional in every way. I have often marveled at how difficult life can seem – even WITH every single advantage, even with the love and support of a great family and support system, being born in one of the most free, affluent and progressive societies in the world.

India Arie has a song about the world being a ghetto – how no matter where you live; there are parts of our societies that are challenging, downtrodden, and difficult. But also how some people ALWAYS transcend these situations. We always find a way out. Poverty and suffering take different forms – in the U.S. and other “western/developed” societies – this is often a poverty of spirit, of loneliness, of isolation and extreme individualism. In the “developing” or “resource-scarce” countries, suffering takes on a much more physical and literal form – hunger, pain, lack of safe and secure housing or education, or various forms of abuse or mistreatment. We in the developed world can learn so much from the developing world. When I was in Kenya, I was fascinated by how the people in the informal settlements truly seemed to take care of one another. It is the same here in Namibia – if one family or household is hungry, neighbors will often help out. Children are not the sole responsibility of the parents, but truly of the entire village – aunts, uncles and grandparents, will all rally around a child to mentor and support them, and to support them financially and materially. As someone who is a student of social capital, I find it very interesting to compare the level and quality of social capital here in Namibia, for example, vs. in the United States. Somehow it is here that I have truly felt a sense of community. In the U.S., I rarely knew the names of my neighbors, and I sadly see my family only 1-2 times per year. Here, that would be unheard of. This is all to say that we are not to pity or judge one another – much to the contrary, there is so much we can learn from each other.

This is something I have struggled with in my teaching lately. I do not agree with the “banking” model of teaching. Teaching and learning are meant to be elastic, synergistic “give and take” relationships – with the “teacher” learning just as much from the students as the students learn from the teacher. The learning process is dynamic and engaging. Due to classroom management and various faltering levels of English skills as well as critical thinking skills, however, I struggle to implement this philosophy in the classroom. But, I believe there will come a day in Namibia when critical thinking and English fluency are inherent. However, the country is still young and is still in many ways healing and recovering from the legacy of apartheid. My students really struggle with critical thinking. These are the remnants of social oppression – during apartheid, blacks were taught only the basics in order to “keep them down,” to not allow them to gain too much power and knowledge. The whites did not want them to become a threat. It is people who were educated under that system that are now teachers. The vagaries of apartheid, of colonialism, and oppression, take generations and generations to heal and recover. A much respected colleague of mine in Kenya told me once that Kenyans “often wait for a white person to come in with the solutions” – simply because this is what colonialism trained them to do. This is obviously wrong – it is always the local people who know the solutions and answers best. Whether they know it or not, they have what they need within them.

I like the terms allyship and accompaniment because that is the best that we can hope to do. All I can do is accompany my star learner S as she finds her way. All my Kenyan colleague can do is gradually claim her power over time – realizing that she herself holds all the power and all of the solutions within herself that she will ever need. Namibians will see that they can think critically, creatively, that they can use their own words, harness the incredible power of education and language to map a positive course for the future of their country.

And all we will be able to do is sit back in awe and watch the beauty of this country unfold. This is the day I look forward to in Namibia. When students such as S have a chance to take on leadership positions and to chart a positive course. It will happen, just wait.

Phots ~

I am including this week a few random photos.

First, my homeroom class – I love them very much. These are the 8 A Shining Stars, as they recently named themselves. You can see they have a LOT of energy. The second one is also of some learners at our school. Finally, you can see me…I was taking photos of my students to help memorize their names….and they insisted on taking this shot of me.

Last term we had some guests from Kinderhilfe Germany visit our school. (Due to the history of Germany occupying Namibia, there are many connections, programs, and partnerships between the two countries.). The photo below is of one of the students who observed my classroom.

Finally, here are some of my students again. The one on the right is quite taken with Langston Hughes after a human rights lesson we had featuring him, the Harlem renaissance and some of his poetry. This is precisely what we aim for – to foster a love of learning and a passion for literature. It is special when your approach resonates with some of the students – I am finding teaching to be very fulfilling.

Until next time…sending love from Namibia!

Follow the path . . .

Follow the path of the unsafe, independent thinker. Expose your ideas to the dangers of controversy. Speak your mind and fear less the label of 'crackpot' than the stigma of conformity. And on issues that seem important to you, stand up and be counted at any cost.

Thomas J. Watson