Then Let Us Work Together

This week I am posting about two difficult topics: colonialism and gender equality.

The topic of colonialism surfaced last week in an interaction I had with some friends and neighbors. In his book about the horrible genocide which took place in Rwanda, Philip Gourevitch states that “all colonization is violence.” I agree. Last week, I had some friends over. As I have said before, the remnants of apartheid are very apparent in Namibia. My friends are both white and black Namibians. At the gathering, some of the white Namibians were making racist comments about the blacks. When I quoted Gourevitch, agreeing with him that colonization is indeed violent, my neighbor retorted that the U.S. too has a dark legacy of slavery, Jim Crow, segregation, etc. We could go on to add today’s mass incarceration, which is heavily biased against black American men, as argued eloquently in Michelle Alexander’s The New Jim Crow. My friend is right that I, as an American, should be humble and aware of the work yet to be done in terms of social justice, race and reconciliation. But it doesn’t mean that I don’t have an opinion about the blatant racism that I too frequently encounter here. It doesn’t mean that the U.S. and Namibia can’t learn from each other about where we stand in our journey of race and reconciliation. This is, in fact, one of the primary goals of the U.S. Peace Corps – to foster understanding between the U.S. and other nations of the world.

My face burned with shame as I looked at my black Namibian friend as our white neighbors and community members made statement after statement, generalizing about “the blacks.” In retrospect, I wish I had spoken up. The question is always: how can I be an ally? How can I use my own (unearned) privilege to ally with others on their journey towards realizing their own human rights. Jeannie Berwick, Executive Director of One Equal Heart Foundation calls this “accompaniment,” which is a term that I find helpful.

Lila Watson’s quote sums it up well:

"If you have come here to help me, then you are wasting your time…But if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together."

I am trying hard to find the best way to be an ally, to be a champion for social justice, to be a good role model for my students, and to live up to the high ideals that I have for myself and others. It is not easy – it is very much like walking a cultural tightrope, knowing you often have no right to speak up as it is not your country, culture or language. There are clearly things you can never understand about this foreign place. Yet many times we have an obligation to speak up, to use our voices to advocate for others who do not have a voice. We have to shine a light as and how we can. Sometimes this means silence so you can be strong when it is necessary, or waiting until the right moment. Sometimes it means realizing you made a mistake, swallowing your pride, and trying again. All we can do is try, but I am confident that together we can make strides towards a more just world. As slow as the progress might be – the important thing is that the march continues.

I also wanted to address gender equality. Last week I attended a Peace Corps training on gender equality and how to form boy’s and girl’s clubs. It was a very helpful training, but one challenging aspect remains. The first day of the training, we were discussing gender equality. One of the Directors from the Namibian Ministry of Gender and Child Welfare was presenting. She made a strong case for just why gender equality work is important in Namibia. For many centuries, women here were oppressed and could not do many things such as own property or land, vote, work, choose who they wanted to marry etc. (Not only, in fact, couldn’t they own property, they were counted as PART of their husband’s property – as though he owned his wife.)

Following her presentation, a Namibian man stood up and said, “Men and women will never be equal. It will never happen.” Now, this man chose to speak out – consider how many others here have the same beliefs, but may not say it outright. This belief is clearly something the man has been taught since he was a boy. Now, he is a mentor for other young men and boys in his region. As a feminist and a strong woman, these words were hard to hear. It is clearly a difference in cultural beliefs, yet hearing this blanket statement causes me great pain for my sisters all over the world who are persecuted and oppressed – who simply aren’t given the same opportunities as men. I think of women throughout history who have suffered and struggled and worked for greater gender equality. I think, for example, of the female activists in “Women of Zimbabwe Arise,” who are working to further human rights for women in Zimbabwe. Many of them have been raped multiple times, and face threats of death daily, but they continue their work because at a certain point, what other choice do you have? I think of Jacqueline Kasha Nabagazera, a LGBTQ activist in Uganda whose best friends have been killed in the name of her struggle for greater gender equality and rights for ALL Ugandans, including those in the LGBTQ struggle. It is these heroes who will change the day, who will slowly but surely change gender norms and move towards greater equality for men and women.

One of the great struggles in this work is to make BOTH men and women feel respected in dialogues, work and discussions on this topic. At our conference, many of the men said they felt “hated and victimized” after the gender equality discussion. Many of us as women felt very disrespected. How can we work together to achieve greater gender norms while maintain an atmosphere of mutual respect?

We will one day find ourselves in a time with great gender and race equality - we are already entering this time, and I have faith that we will continue to make strides to continue to achieve greater equality in all areas. This is the audacity of hope.